Losing My Mind

Losing something or someone is never a good way to have a great day. Somethings are easily found and the day seems to get better, but there are things that you may lose forever that take a toll on ones emotions. It maybe a relationship that needs a change and you feel like it is a lost cause so you move on. Or it maybe a life the was taken because you could no longer watch the suffering.

Whatever the loss maybe it can seem to weigh heavy on your heart and your mind. You may even think how is it possible to continue from this great loss? Well like many wise people before myself have said, time can heal all wounds. That is not to say the wound will never hurt again, or that in the beginning it can't be reopened. I think of it like when my previously broken foot aches when the weather changes, just like that a loss can ache at times too. Not a day goes by that I don't miss my grandparents and the time that I could of spent with them.

Moving on can seem impossible when everything is fresh and a change is new. Forgiving someone who may have caused that loss may seem like it will never happen, but to move on you will have to forgive. Everyday that we hurt but continue to live we become that much stronger, just like a muscle that you work out and train. There are few things in this world that last forever, loss of some kind is inevitable, it is a sad but true fact. What we must focus on sometimes is Plan B, because even though we may think that there is only one path to happiness that is not true. We are blessed with multiple good ways for life to work out.

Financial Woes

Of all the things that I want to talk about, the thing that is weighing the most in the front of my brain is my current tax season debacle.

I am at a time of great financial difficulty. I sometimes find that I am very jealous of the financial situation my parents had when they were my age. Though they have never been any kind of well off, at least at my age they had each other and an income that could cover their families needs. I have bills, bills and rent and only my income to support it.

I know somewhere deep down that I can do this. I can turn around my current financial situation with hard work and dedication to the task at hand, but I constantly feel the pressure. This is exactly why we are always cautioned to stay out of debt and this is the express reason why. I constantly feel like I am drowning. No wonder the real estate term for a house that is worth less than it's debt is called "under water".

The biggest stress is the feeling of never being able to get out. Just when I think that I got the situation under control the government needs more of my money, I mean what is that all about. Or the doctor charged me for services that weren't part of my preventative care.

So the current solution is that I will work and work hard and hopefully soon I will be able to find a second (part-time) job, at which I can work a little more and start to make a dent in this small iceberg of debt that I currently have. It is like anti-global warming in my wallet.

In the end, I know that this is a sacrifice that I must make, for not only my health and stress levels but also to increase my quality of life. I want to travel and can't, I am even looking at not being able to attend weddings and conference which are very important to me. And even more than that, I am looking to get married, not anytime in the near future, however when the right guy comes along I know that I personally can't marry him until this debt is taken care of. It is very important advice that I received that I wish I would have listened to long before this.