Gardener for Life

I have always loved gardening! Even before I could really walk I was doing it, and best of all it was something that I got to do with my Grandfather when he was still alive. I remember the fruits and vegetables that we used to grow and eat were so delicious and though it was hard work, there was more than enough food for our grandparents, my family, my aunt and uncle's family and then some. We shared with whomever would want to eat, literally, the fruits of our labor.

Me, Grandpa and Grandma

These days things are a little different, Grandpa has been gone almost two years and I live farther away from my immediate family in an apartment with no lawn or really any ground to plow and sow my fields. But with the help of the internet, Pinterest, my friends and my knowledge from my Grandfather, I am working yet again on a little garden of my own. I have become very obsessed with the idea of being able to at least provide myself and my friends with a minimum of fresh fruits and vegetables this year.

Growing everything out of containers and raised planters, if I get that ambitious. But for know I am starting with some aloe vera, tomato and zucchini that I picked up at the store this last weekend. If all goes well I am hoping soon to add some strawberries and blackberries which I will be growing out of a wooden pallet of all things. It will be amazing if I manage to get it all together and working. But even if I don't quite get it right this time I can try again next year and learn from my mistakes this time. And if I do get it right, then more berry scones to go around.

My little garden beginnings - Day 1

Underestimating The Opponent

I am not sure how many of you are familiar with organized sports and I don't know how many people do this professionally, but when I was playing sports in high school and we had a game, I can remember always sizing up the other team. At first you do it mentally, I would talk to my team and my coach about their knowledge of the other team and of the players. We would look at stats of their games and prepare for plays and moves that they might try to use against us. Then it would become visual, seeing the other players and looking for their physical disadvantages, are they shorter, thinner, heavier, or perhaps clumsy as they warm up for the game.

What I have learned, and hopefully have taught many others by the way that I carry myself, is that all the mental and physical preparation can be very helpful but you can never really tell what you are up against until you are actually experiencing it. Furthermore, more often than not, I personally have underestimated my opponent, but more so they have almost always underestimated me.

 I have never been a small person, always a little huskier than the other girls, not very tall and just decent at every sport I played. I knew the moves and I had the heart but I was never the star player. What I did have was deception, by which I mean my opponent would see me and think hey that girl is bigger and probably slower, I bet I won't have to worry about her. WRONG! I am not the fastest but I can move quickly, probably not the strongest but I can hold my own and definitely more graceful when I move or when I fall than some girls I have seen only half my size.

I don't say these things to boast myself or to try and hurt other people's feelings, so I hope that it doesn't come across like that, my only point with this post is to bring to your attention that people are more than they seem on the outside. It is true that sometimes people are what they show to the world, but so many times you will find that this is not so. But no matter what situation you are in, whether it be sports or just everyday life, try your hardest to not underestimate your opponent. You may never know how low they may drag you or how hard they may hit you or even how sly they may be. Prepare yourself to the best of your abilities, work hard and try your best, but never think for one minute that your opponent hasn't trained and prepared just as hard as you have.

Puzzle Pieces

Puzzles can be metaphors for many things, but they work really well for the analogy of small pieces making up a bigger picture. With each small piece you can't necessarily tell what the overall image is going to be, it takes a couple of pieces together to start to form the begins of the picture. Sometimes a section to the right of the puzzle forms and then a section in the bottom corner. Slowly things come together.

It can take a long time to get the whole puzzle of our lives together, in fact it pretty much takes an entire lifetime and maybe then some to get it all completed. But what I am fast learning is that each of us can take away some happiness even from the partial sections of the puzzle that are beginning to come together.

I think most recently I can apply this concept into my life through a health stand point. I am no doubt far from perfect in the eat healthy, work out everyday mind set, but today was one of those days that I notice a small section of my puzzle coming together. At work our offices get cleaned once every other week and I can usually monitor what week it is by how much my trash is full. For a while I was eating out a lot at lunch but for the last while I have been working on improving dislike of preparing meals to bring to work.

I have eaten out very little in the recent past and it definitely reflected the hard work that I have been putting into making that change in my life. When the janitor came in to clean my office this morning my trash was less than 3/4 full. Usually when I eat out more often it it compacted at least twice by my foot and still overflowing but not this time. A sound purchase in some snapware, doing more dishes at home and staying in some nights to cook food to last a couple of days has lead me to better health and a positive step towards saving the environment from my trash.

It may not be a big section of my puzzle it may not even be all that important but it is the small pieces that make up the larger puzzle, and rejoicing the small and simple things is what is going to help get us all through until we are able to see the bigger picture and how beautiful that is.

Sweating It Out

I once had a friend that asked me why I enjoyed going home and showering right after the gym. I have always known part of the reason is because dang I stink after all that working out but I always knew there was something else involved. A different feeling that was more than just cleaning myself or letting my muscles relax in the warm water. Though those are both reasons that I do it as well.

I am currently re-reading my favorite book and it occurred to me that what I love most about showering right after a work out is this, there is a small victory that comes with washing away the sweat. In the book the water is recycled in the space station so the main character talks about everyone else getting a part of his sweat, the sweat of victory, of accomplishing something that no one thought he could do. That is how I feel every time I work out and then take a shower. It is part of victory for me, and everyone else will know I am victorious as the sweat is washed away and I am left clean and healthier.

Happy To Be Without

I got home tonight and was weirdly happy for the first time in a while that I am not in a relationship. Not because I don’t want one, of course not, I am honestly looking forward to having someone to cook dinner for and sit with to watch TV with on Sunday nights, but today I was just happy that I didn’t have someone who would take me away from all the people and things that I get to enjoy in my life.

I know that there are plenty of people that get into relationships and don’t miss out on their family and friends, but there are some that unintentionally seem to push away from those around them. They lose themselves in a relationship and everyone else falls by the wayside. I hope that when the time comes I will not be one of those people.

One thing that I always seem to forget is how lucky I am to have the people I do in my life. But because of the counseling that I have been going to, my counselor always reminds me that I am blessed to have such supportive and wonderful people in my life and that they are lucky to have a friend like me.

You Can't Run Away

In the recent past I have taken up running. It has never been my favorite thing, I have only found the want to run if there was a purpose, like playing a sport or running away from zombies or other dangerous situations. No need to worry thought the latter has only happened a couple of times.

Running is definitely something that I am doing because well it is free and I can't afford a gym right now. It does have it's set backs such as my knee tweaking for a couple of days after each run/jog/walk. And the air is still cold from winter and makes my asthma kick in to high gear causing coughing fits even when I have taken my inhaler as prescribed. But I know there are benefits too.

I now that my body is reacting to the exercise even if it is not much. My clothes are fitting a little better and I can definitely tell that my body is getting stronger. Though I realized the other day that these are not the only reasons that I have been running. I have been running because it gives me the feeling of being able to run away from life's problems.

Not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing but it is what it is. When there are problems or feelings that have been troubling me throughout the day I can just run away from them. It is a time when no one can get to me. A place and time when it is just me, I don't answer any text messages or anything of that sort, and I just run away from everything that might be plaguing me. The only thing that is hard sometimes is coming back from the run and remembering the reality that I running from my problems doesn't actually solve anything.

Surprise Blessing

Had a great experience tonight, got a phone call around 6:30 pm from the branch president asking if he could come visit me. Well he actually used the word "we", I did not know who that implied but I said yes anyways. especially since he said they were just coming over to check in on me.

This might seem odd but I need quite a bit of checking up on. Though I can take care of myself and another living creature, as shown by my dishes drying on the counter and my sleeping dog in the corner, it is nice to have someone of high authority come by and bring a priesthood presence to the house.

And that is what happened, though I was a little shocked that I was being visited/ home taught by the branch president and the stake president. When you open the door to that image you tend to wonder what exactly you did to warrant this visit. They truly did just come by to visit and talk though, and once they got past the vicious dog they were able to sit in peace. We talked about how I am doing in work and at home, with my finances and my interest in theater and what I am doing with that recently.

The best part of the night came when they were about to leave and unexpectedly the stake president asked if I wanted a priesthood blessing. I was taken aback by the question at first, I guess my first thought was why would I need one everything seems to be going fine right now, but when the stake president offers a blessing how can anyone refuse. So I accepted and branch president blessed me with all of the things that I need right now and somethings that I have been thinking about and some that I have not. What a wonderful experience to have tonight, when I was feeling a little low before.